300 For The Liberal Douche

I just exerted my person from the denizens of my local theatre with grandoise disgust. For before my visual orbital aids on the digitally projected screen runk the rankest of the rank.

300, directed by mysogynist extraordinaire Zak Snyder, is a movie of flippin' offensive images one unto the other. Snyder, director of Dawn of the Dead, 2004's borish gore grandoise, weaves a web of wholesale "action", nudity, and lateral thinking, all designed to trap and consume each and every viewer (not unlike many of Earth's many venomous/endangered arachnids).

There isn't a single redeeming quality of any character in 300. The men are hulking, testosterone injected roast beefs (you'd think these guys would've at least heard of pacifism), decrying social democracism and promoting blatant facist and totalitarian grandoise.

Every male here is committed to being a soldier (don't even get me started on the film's Pro-Iraq agenda). What kind of message is Hollywood sending us when depicting a filsociety where "ugly" babies are thrown to their blatant deaths based on pure looks alone.

Not even the women are safe. Oh, excuse me, the meat. The females here are merely sex slaves, no surprise, as Hollywood tends to forget that women have had the right to vote since, um....ever. I dare anyone to name me a strong female lead from any mainstream movie of the last five years. You can't do it.

So here's how 300 adds up, on the politico scale:

environmentalism - Shockingly, there's nary an appliance in sight. The 300 don't even use cars, so that's a plus. Their replacement is hardly acceptable.....

animal rights - Rhinos and elephants are used as tanks, thrown off cliffs, and skewered. I'm pretty sure the pelts are real animal, and not a mock up, so thumbs down here.

women's lib - I doubt the filmmaker's have even heard of the term.

freedom of choice - While there are infants being thrown off cliffs, indicating a pro-choice stance here, the overall lunaticism of the facist message negates any valid point the film may have.

capital punishment - The 300 indeed support the death penalty. Heck, they murder a messenger and his bodyguards in cold blood, casting them into a pit execution style, with nary a fair trial in sight.

So if you support bigotry and the prevalant phase of political in-correctness the country i currently in, you'll love 300. If you're a decent person with some actual compassion, you'd better avoid.

I'll be back next week with a review of Grindhouse.